I don't even want to call it a poem...

It rhymes and whatnot but I am not sure what 'form' of poetry it even falls under. If it does at all.




Since life is short and at times hard to bear, I make it a point to try and put my feelings in the air.
Simply put, one has no real clue of just how long we will be there.
Some think 'Well Mark, some things need not be said or that sounds almost suicidal.'
To that I say 'Over the years many things I have heard in passing that seemed unimportant turned out to be vital'.
It was like God has been speaking to me even through people I whom I don't even deal with too tough.
It may not make sense at the time but those thoughts, those experiences ALWAYS SEEM TO COME BACK WHEN THINGS GET ROUGH.
I am just putting back into this thing called Life the only way I know how to get it done.
I may not go to church, the Hall, or have become Ordained like the boy Rev Run.
But I KNOW THAT I WAS PUT HERE TO HELP THOSE in their struggle and their fight.
I know it 'cause even in times that I have been wrong, when I have shared it, I have helped others make their situation right.
Does that make me praiseworthy? Make me some one to look up to? Special? Someone to revere?
Not all. It just makes me the person around you who through good, bad and indifferent, whose opinions you will hear.
You too may brush it off. The sayings, the stories, the opinions, the experiences and such.
Dismiss them as just 'What he/she went through..I am me...What he/she has done does not matter much'
I am here to tell you that I thought that too. I said myself "I am different...That won't be me..."Oh yes it is true.
I can hear me saying it clear as day. Probably with the same face. Same dismissive attitude. Just like you.
The thing I learned though was that while the slangs changed. The names did as well. The situations all stayed even keel.
I learned that while I was younger, thought I was fresher than the ones before, I wasn't reinventing the wheel.
The things that I was going through or 'thought I was doing' had been done hundreds of times over.
From Lenoir NC. From that lil 'hollar' in West Virginia. Down in DC. And yes, even at DSU down in Dover.
People had BEEN ran from the law. Been having babies. Been busting shots.
Lied, cheated, had it all, fell from grace. Got BACK UP. Went and saw the world. Parked their cars in the finest lots.
The only differences between them and I was that THEY MADE IT and I wasn't taking advantage of the gems being dropped.
Oh yeah I heard them. Repeated them to others. Maybe halfway listened. But that is where it stopped.
I look back and laugh now at those times. Those situations that some of you HERE have shared.
I remember even being asked to speak to 'you' by the ones who loved you and took the time to care.
I chuckle at that memory that your 'people' sought me to speak to you & instilled a trust..
That look from you of "I don't know what the (beep) they thought? He is foul just like us..." (Hov)
Yeah, I was once the person that I am trying to reach now but still not done growing and learning.
Now responsible for three whom I can't leave wondering. Still yearning.
So I put it all in the air. Maybe one day they can come back and read what they old man thought.
Maybe one day this too will help them. Just like all those people did for me. Just look at all the wisdom that bought.
It is not just for them though. Since I take information as well I do it for you too.
I do it subtly. Some of ya'll are too sensitive so I try to do it so that even you 'have no clue'.